AuthorAimee Lyndon-Adams

Home»Articles Posted by Aimee Lyndon-Adams

In Praise of Ease

Up until now, pain is seemingly a non-negotiable, but suffering is a different matter; it is a choice.

Instead of suffering and struggling, we could choose the path of ease and joy. Suffering comes from resisting what is happening. Ease and joy comes from flowing with it. Every time you experience suffering, it is a sign that you are off track and have stepped out of the flow. Suffering comes from pushing our bodies to perform beyond the balance point that preserves your wellbeing. Continuing to work in this “danger zone” further stresses, depletes and exhausts you.

With so many choices and responsibilities in life, you may find yourself pushed to your limit, unable to relax when you do have a moment and disconnected from the people and activities you most enjoy. What’s perhaps even worse is that you always feel stalked by failure, fear, anxiety.

One popular solution is to live a simpler life, but, what if there was a way to navigate your life in a way that allowed you to fully show up for the people and activities that truly matter to you, and let you refuel, reboot and rejuvenate along the way?

A few benefits: When your body is at rest, you are your most creative, powerful and strong. When stressed, vision closes down and reduces your options; when you are relaxed, vision opens up and you are able to see many choices. Stress creates more problems; you get to waste time cleaning up your messes, instead of getting it right the first time. Ease and joy become ways you navigate through life; course correcting each time you
recognize you have chosen off path.

I was lucky that in my late 20’s, I heard a term that really got my attention: restful alertness, the ability to be deeply at rest in the midst of activity. The teachers of this meditation practice were
peaceful and yet dynamic, and charismatic. Later, I explored the idea of being “comfortable in my own skin” through a process of grounding and centering. These two practices have become a way of life for me. My life partner added another, “Don’t hold unnecessary tension in the body.”

I keep my choice for joy and ease top of mind. My body is now a tool of discernment. I trust it completely. Its innate wisdom helps me determine what I want to do (my body opens, moves
forward, feels upbeat) and what I don’t (my body contracts, moves away from and feels overwhelmed). My body also lets me know when it needs a break; I lose the ability to focus, feel restless or start yawning. These breaks can be as short as 5-10 minutes, time for a walk around the garden, drink a cup of tea mindfully, or close the eyes for a few minutes.

If you believe that life is a struggle, remember that Maya Angelou says, “When you know better, you do better.”


Living From Pleasure to Pleasure

Have you ever wondered why two people who face the exact same set of circumstances in life react in very different ways? One appreciates all that she does have; the other focuses on everything she doesn’t. One changes everything she has the power to change in her circumstances; the other complains bitterly about being dealt a poor hand.

Many years ago, I had a breakthrough in my thinking when I realized that the quality of life is all in how you hold it. We know that what you put your attention on expands and yet, many of us do not question the context of our lives. For example, do you believe that the Universe really does mean you well? That it is always partnering you by bringing you what you say you want through your thoughts, words, feelings, and actions? That it really does conspire to shower you with blessings? Or, do you spend your life living in fear, waiting for the other shoe to drop?

Growing up in England, I didn’t understand that I could choose again if I didn’t like the consequences of a choice I had made and that I could choose again and again until I did. I was taught that “Once you’d made your bed – you had to lie in it.” But, luckily, once on the spiritual path, I learned that you navigate your life through your choices, most of them unconscious.

Bringing my choices into conscious awareness was my first step and recognizing that the quality of my life was dependent on the quality of the choices I made was the second. I started weeding out or delegating what I didn’t love to do and releasing the people in my life that brought me down. I let go of should do’s and have to do’s. I replaced them with want to do’s. And, then a truly radical idea occurred to me: I could choose to live my life from pleasure to pleasure! What a concept! I saw how from the moment that I awoke, setting the energy of my day through meditation and gentle stretching, enjoying my morning tea in a beautiful cup and then nibbling on delicious fresh berries, I moved effortlessly from pleasure to pleasure throughout my day.

I could say that I am fortunate to love my work but more truthfully, I take responsibility for constantly redefining it, along with my client base, even my business partners – with each change increasing the quality and my pleasure. I am fully present with each activity and each client; before moving to the next one, I refresh my energy through grounding and centering so that I am always presenting my best self. In this way, I have energy left over for my evening with my intimate partner.

If I am not experiencing pleasure, I recognize that I must have made a wrong choice and simply choose again.


My Defining Moment

From time to time, I’ve found myself sharing a profound experience I had many years ago, but this is the very first time I’ve ever written about it.  That said, let me set the scene for you: I was in my late 20’s, newly divorced, still living in England and working in a bank.  I remember looking at some of the other female employees who had worked there forever and wondering if that would be my fate.  Already, I had spent 11 years of my life in those same four walls, and living in the same town that I had grown up in.

Obviously, my soul was communicating to me that it was time for a change and so it was unsurprising that within a very few short months, I had resigned my job and said, “yes!” to a new opportunity that seemingly came out of the blue.  Some months prior, I had begun a formal meditation practice and attended a follow-up course of instruction.  At the end of this course, we were presented with a chance to interview for a work-study position in France and Switzerland.  The agreement was that for every 3 days worked, I would earn one day of my teacher training.  Jobs were assigned as needed and could be changed on a moment’s notice.  It sounded like the exact antithesis of my life as it was and was extremely appealing.

I had begun dating again after my failed marriage and my boyfriend was also on the meditation course with me.  He was clear that he also wanted to sign up but was adamant that we needed to make our decisions independent of each other, as we were early in our relationship.  I agreed to this, understanding that what he was saying was, “Don’t count on me to be there for you.”

My first assignment was in Courchevel, a ski resort on the French/Swiss border.  I was to be second cook for a group of 30 women who were on a vegetarian diet of soups and salads.  “I can do this,” I thought, as I was already vegetarian and had packed some of my most favorite cookbooks in case I was assigned to a kitchen.  On my breaks, I sat on a mountainside, thoroughly enjoying the beautiful change of scene and my own willingness to change up my life.  My delight, however, was short-lived.  Just two weeks later, the word came down that we were moving location and everyone was to pack our belongings and board a bus heading to Vittel, a town in the Vosges, Northern France that was known for its healing water.

On the bus, one of the coordinators came to sit with me to discuss my next assignment.  “We want you to be the chef of the Nouvel Hotel, serving 300 teacher trainees.  You are responsible for the hiring of servers, food preps, and other cooks, as well as managing our vendors.  You will design all the menus and staff schedules.  Oh yes, and we need to know now if you will do it?”

I remember my heart pounding with fear, my stomach lurching, and thinking, “Well, I’m either going to sink or swim – and I’m not going to sink!”

When I arrived at the Hotel Nouvel, I found that my boyfriend had accepted the job of hotel manager but quite honestly, we were both so busy that we hardly got to see each other.  There was a manual of dreary-looking recipes and a set of deep dish serving containers that looked like troughs!  Hardly appetizing to eat food out of, I thought.  I kept looking.  I found a set of oval stainless steel platters and talked to my servers.  I explained that we would garnish every platter and serve each meal as if it were a banquet.  I knew that it would mean more work for them but would allow them much more pride in the work.  They agreed.  Then, I poured over the cookbooks I had brought from home – could the ingredients be multiplied and still retain the integrity of the dish?  I decided it was worth a shot.

My kitchen was quickly dubbed, “Aimée’s Love Kitchen.”  Not only did everyone want to eat at the Nouvel Hotel, everyone on the work-study program wanted to work in my kitchen!

What an amazing 10 months of my life!  Highlights includes making fresh pineapple juice, cooking 300 artichokes in a 5-foot long steamer, cooking corn fritters in a copper paella pan that was over 2-foot wide, defrosting turkeys the night before Thanksgiving and serving them for breakfast the morning afterwards, eating frog’s legs with my head of the maids and her husband the grounds keeper, and couscous with my Moroccan pot washer and his family.  Oh yes, and did I mention I met my next husband?  Yes, he so wanted into my kitchen that he pretended he could cook – he produced an incredibly beautifully decorated rice pilaf in just 15 minutes for his interview – only to be busted when I tasted it and of course the rice was uncooked!!!  He still got the job!  I’ll never forget the look on my boyfriend’s face when I told him that I was leaving him – priceless!

When, I realized that I was now ready for my own Teacher Training course, I reflected on what this experience had taught me.  I realized that, if I could do this – I could do anything!  

The next years of my life gave me pause to remember this defining moment.  I told myself that if I could be the Director of Service Quality for Citibank, I could be a Service Director in any industry, without knowing that industry.  True!  I became Director of Corporate Service Quality for Charles Schwab without knowing a thing about the brokerage industry.  Did I succeed?   I won the Presidential Breakthrough Achievement Award.

Then, I was invited by a former peer to join her as a senior consultant in an International training company.  I told her that I knew nothing about training and undaunted, she replied, “You’re a natural.  I can teach you anything you need to know.”  Little did either of us know that our mandate was about to be changed and we spent our first year in the company learning how to design multi-media training courses.  “Why,” I kept asking?  I soon found out.  My first job as an entrepreneur, four years later, was to be a partner in a multi-media training company!

A defining moment is a point at which the essential nature or character of a person is revealed or identified.  I found out what I’m made of – and I like it!

All of us have these defining moments that fuel us in our professional and personal life and support us marshalling our courage to leap into unknown territory, as needed.  They allow us to trust in our process and to take appropriate risks in business but also in matters of the heart.

I’d love to hear about your defining moments, if you’d be willing to share at

Love and blessings,

Why Success Doesn’t Automatically Bring Fulfillment

Are you a professional who realizes that the success you have worked so hard to achieve has not brought you the fulfillment it promised?

When you focus on success in one arena, it usually means you are paying a price in other areas of your life.

Let me use an example, one that’s very familiar to many of you reading this article.

What price are you paying for your success?

How many of you feel that you give the best of yourself to your work and the worst of yourself to your loved ones?  I know that I used to do just that!   Get up at the crack of dawn to go to the office and burn the midnight oil trying to get everything done – a losing battle, for sure.   Exhausted, I had nothing left in the tank for my relationship and not surprisingly it failed!  And the next one, and the next one! Until one day, it hit me – I had put on about 30 lbs, was dragging myself out of bed every day – it didn’t matter how much money I was making, I never had anytime to enjoy it or anyone special to spend it with!

Are you constantly shortchanging yourself?

Do you feel like you’re trying to fit your life in around your work and realize that you are constantly shortchanging yourself?  When we ask our clients what truly matters to them, most married people agree that it’s their family, their spouses and their kids.  It’s the reason they are working so hard.  And yet, if we ask the spouses and kids, their biggest complaint is lack of quality time with our client!

Most of our clients also agree that relationship intimacy is what truly matters and yet it’s the area that typically suffers the most!  Being chained to your PDA, like an umbilical cord, doesn’t create a lot of room for intimacy and neither does repeatedly getting home from work exhausted – right?

Others quote their health as what truly matters and yet invest no time or energy in eating well, exercising and getting enough rest.  But they do tell themselves that someday they will join a gym, or go to the one they pay dues to! Or someday, they will lose the extra pounds that creep on every year.  In one of the Fortune 500 companies I used to work for, it was 10 lbs a year!  Unfortunately, someday is not a day of the week!

Where is the gap?

What is in the gap between success and fulfillment for you, and between what you say is important versus what you do about it?  Do one thing differently to close that gap now.

I could go on, but you get the point!  Fulfillment comes from knowing what’s most important to you, and making sure that you invest enough of your energy in the right places to get a positive return on your investment.

If this article stirred a response in you, we’d love to hear your thoughts at

Be well,

Powered by WishList Member - Membership Software

Claim Your FREE Gift!

7 Steps to Do Less and Accomplish More!

It’s a combination of the know-how and removing the obstacles.

 We can help you with these three steps because we have a consistent track record of doing so, both as corporate executives and as entrepreneurs and business owners.


    You have Successfully Subscribed!