Blog

Top 10 Best Email Habits

Summer has arrived!

Longer days and lighter clothing, barbeques, outdoor music and dancing, special time with family and fireworks are the order of the day. Like many, you have good intentions to do this summer differently, making time for what really matters to you – right?

Each day you start out full steam ahead, promising that you will leave work on time with energy left over for the evening. For many of you even with the best of intentions you rarely meet this desire, so much is tugging at you to complete each day.

One area that is consistently an energy drain is email, the neverending in-box, which seems to fill up as quickly as it gets emptied, if it ever gets emptied.

I feel this one every day and decided it was time to tame the dragon. Improving your email habits can drastically increase your productivity.

Like any new approach, these take focus and practice.

But after awhile, they will become habits that support you.

  1. Check email only at scheduled times for a specified amount of time. Twice a day for 30-60 minutes works well for many. Unplug until the next scheduled time.
  2. Unsubscribe relentlessly. Make sure you receive only the things you really want to—and do—read. If you have trepidation about letting something go, write down the company name in a file, for easy access later. If you really miss it re-subscribe.
  3. Reduce the amount of routed email (i.e., cc’d from coworkers) to only that which is essential.
  4. “Slash and burn” on your first pass through your inbox, this makes a big difference. Use the second pass for replies and other follow-up actions.
  5. Empty your inbox every day and keep it that way. Delete most and file the rest.
  6. Include all of your contact information in your signature—phone, fax, website—so that others don’t have to hunt for this information.
  7. One topic, one subject. Change the subject line when conversation turns to another topic, and break up multiple topics into separate emails for easy filing and recall.
  8. Count to ten before clicking “Send.” Make sure your email is clear and represents what you really want to say to avoid a lot of back-and-forth later.
  9. Include in your replies the original context of the email so you (and others) don’t have to hunt for it later.
  10. Resist the temptation to check your email more than your scheduled times! It’s a simple step but has a profound effect on productivity.

Look back over this list to see what stands out to you. Set yourself up for success by choosing 1-2 areas to focus to begin with. Once you have mastered those choose 1-2 more.

Congratulations, you are on your way to taming the email dragon and having more time to live the life that truly matters.

I would love to hear what resonated with you from this article, let’s begin a dialogue. Email me at info@whattrulymatters.com

Love and Blessings,

When Life Presents The Big Questions

I have been on quite a journey since the beginning of the year.

To be honest, I asked for it…

Have you heard the saying, “Beware of what you ask for – you just might get it”?  I think you know where this is going, don’t you?

I had been feeling a deep sense of unrest for a few months, a yearning for something more and yet not sure what I was yearning for. After wrestling with it month after month, I realized I was experiencing a need to deepen my spiritual practice; I wanted to know my soul more intimately.

You may be asking yourself, “What does that mean?” I was asking myself the same thing.

I walked with the question for many weeks and was not any closer to an answer than I had been at the beginning. What I did begin to notice was the falling away of old patterns and daily habits that had been very supportive for me over the years.

I began my day as I had for many years with heart Centered Grounding and Centering, spiritual reading and contemplation, prayer, and stillness. I would choose an intention for the day as my touchstone. Imagine my surprise when I reached for these tools and found I felt flat!

Even though the grounding and centering continued to keep me connected, and my energy field protected, which is so very important, I realized I wanted more, although I was still not sure where to turn. I finally relaxed into being with whatever was present. In the morning I would ground and center and find myself staring out the window for an hour.

Each day it was slightly different, without any of the structure I had in the past. I did not feel lost as much as I felt I was in a void.

Two opportunities showed up that addressed this deep yearning to know my soul. The first one was a 9-week course with Neale Donald Walsch, titled, Living From Your Soul. I laughed out loud when the email arrived in my in-box. The second was a weekend with Pema Chodron and Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche at the Being Brave 3-day retreat, held in Pt. Richmond CA. I was not actively looking for either of these, yet they arrived at the perfect time

Finally, the void became a very rich place to be as I played with “what if?”

“What if I just relax into this?” “What if I have everything I need?” “What if I designed something new for the beginning of my day and the end of my day?”

“What if I drew from the wealth of knowing I already had within without needing inspiration from other sources for this present time?” “What if…?”

I began a morning and evening experiment…

In the morning:

  • State out loud how I wanted to show up in this day, focused, happy, engaged, inspired, grateful, connected, etc.
  • Write down my area of focus and look at it often to keep me on track
  • Allow myself to be with whatever arose during my morning time, it was just fine if each day was different from the one before and unstructured.

In the evening, I had an end of the day review:

  • Did I accomplish what I wanted to do?
  • Is there something I would have liked to do differently?
  • Could I have made better supportive choices in my day with food, judgments, exercise, etc?

I became more regular with my journaling as the changes were often subtle.

What I have noticed is that:

  • I am much more in the flow of life.
  • I am happier and more peace filled thorough out the day.
  • I bring more laughter and playfulness to everything I do.
  • My creativity has been enhanced.
  • My inner guidance and soul are informing me continually if I am in alignment or not.
  • I am choosing to let go and flow with whatever is showing up. It is not always comfortable yet it is always worth it.

I would love to hear what resonated with you from this article, let’s begin a dialogue.

Email me at info@whattrulymatters.com

Love and Blessings,

Bounce Back: Developing Emotional Resilience

Major disruptions are a “gotcha” we all experience at one time or another in our lives. We get fired, laid off or passed over; a loved one dies, leaves or gets in trouble; a project stalls or gets cancelled. Often the “gotcha” is a disappointment when life takes an unexpected turn. The list, unfortunately, is endless.

In our current times you would be hard pressed to find anyone that is not experiencing some very challenging situations in their life or the lives of those close to them. We are deeply impacted when those we love are going through difficult times, and it is important to acknowledge that impact.

A far more subtle form of “gotcha” can be the process of our growth.  Over the past months I have felt stretched and pulled to grow in my life and business, it has been very uncomfortable, with a lot of uncertainty throughout and yet I welcome it. Now let’s be clear, welcoming these energies does not make it any easier, it allows me to become a partner in the process which removes layers of resistance, yet is still carries the same energy of disruption.

For some, the impact of these hard times is overwhelming. Recovery, if it comes at all, can be painfully slow. Others show admirable resilience and are able to glide through these times fairly easily, bouncing back to a normal life again quickly. Resilience—the strength required in adapting to change—acts as our internal compass so we can resourcefully navigate an upset.

When unexpected events turn life upside down, it’s the degree to which our resiliency comes into play that makes these “make-or-break” situations opportunities for growth. The good news is that each of us has the capacity to reorganize our life after a disruption and to achieve new levels of strength and meaningfulness. Though it’s easy to feel vulnerable in the midst of chaos and uncertainty, disruptions are not necessarily a bad thing because they help us grow and meet future challenges in our lives. It’s a lot like a bone that was once fragile or broken, and is now strong from being used or strong at the formerly broken places.

So how can you become more resilient? Here’s a look at seven key characteristics of people who demonstrate resilience during life’s curve balls.

A Sense of Hope and Trust in the World

Resilient people rely on their belief in the basic goodness of the world and trust that things will turn out all right in the end. This positive attitude allows them to weather times when everything seems bleak and to look for and accept the support that is out there. This approach toward the world gives them the ability to hope for a better future.

Interpreting Experiences in a New Light

The ability to look at a situation in a new way (a skill called “reframing”) can minimize the impact of a difficult situation. Resilient people take a creative approach toward solving a problem, and don’t always use an old definition for a new challenge.

A Meaningful System of Support

One of the best ways to endure a crisis is to have the support of another person who can listen and validate your feelings. Knowing that others care and will come to our support decreases the feeling of isolation, especially when tackling a problem alone. It’s important to choose people you trust. Don’t be surprised if it takes several friends, who each can provide different kinds of support. Resilient people aren’t stoic loners. They know the value of expressing their fears and frustrations, as well as receiving support, coaching or guidance from friends, family or a professional.

A Sense of Mastery and Control Over Your Destiny

You may not be able to predict the future, but you can tackle a problem instead of feeling at the mercy of forces outside of your control. Resilient people know that ultimately their survival and the integrity of their life values depend on their ability to take action rather than remain passive. Tough times call for you to tap into your own sense of personal responsibility.

Self-Reflection and Insight

Life’s experiences provide fertile ground for learning. Asking yourself questions that invite introspection can open a door to new understanding and appreciation of who you are and what you stand for. Giving voice to your thoughts and feelings leads to insight and helps transform the meaning of a problem into something useful. Resilient people learn from life situations and do not succumb to punishing themselves because of decisions made in the past.

A Wide Range of Interests

People who show resilience in the face of adversity are those who have a diversity of interests. They’re open to new experiences and ideas. Because their lives are rich and varied, it’s easier for them to find relief from the single mindedness and worry that often accompany a crisis.

Sense of Humor

Have you ever had a wry laugh during a difficult situation? The ability to see the absurdity, irony, or genuine humor in a situation stimulates our sense of hope and possibility. Humor has both psychological and physical benefits in relieving stress because it encourages a swift change in your perception of your circumstances—and when your thoughts change, your mood follows.

Which of the seven areas stands out to you the most? Begin there and then move on to the next. Improving these seven areas now—rather than waiting for adversity to pay a visit—will allow you to bounce back more quickly.

Resiliency is a necessary quality to carry forth through the uncertain times you are experiencing now.  as well as those you can be sure will show up in the future. If you need help navigating any challenges we are just a phone call or email away, we would love to hear from you.

Love and Blessings,

How to Interrupt Negative Patterns

Every day we all feel the pace of life picking up and moving faster and faster; this has become the new normal.  Peace lies in your ability to accept it rather than struggle with it, sometimes easier said than done. The truth is we all experience less desirable/unfavorable situations throughout the days or weeks. Some of these situations are out of your control while some of them are part of your own patterns, and that pattern can be changed. Now isn’t that good news?

When unfavorable situations, actions and emotional conflicts happen again and again in your life—same scene, different characters—there’s a good chance you are in the presence of a negative “pattern.”

Some examples: picking the wrong lovers/partners, conflict with co-workers, being chronically debt ridden, people pleasing, over-giving and a recurring lack of self-care.

At best, these negative patterns cause frustration. At worst, they cause undue suffering, uphill struggle, and sometimes, even disease.

The good news is that you have the power to change these negative patterns. Below are some ways to begin to disrupt them so that you can start laying down new, more positive patterns.

Become aware.

The act of noticing begins the shift away from damaging thoughts or behaviors, no matter how entrenched a pattern seems.  Put simply, you can’t change what you’re not aware of.

One way to become aware is to just sit with your thoughts and watch for the patterns. The goal here is to notice, that’s all.

In this step, focus your awareness on just the facts and feelings of the patterns. Don’t let your mind wander into the analysis of “why” you have them right now, for you will likely try to justify and defend the pattern. You may begin to blame others for this pattern and that will only keep you entrenched in the behavior. You can analyze later (see below); for now, just notice.

Also, ask people you trust to help you see the patterns. (Only talk to your nearest and dearest who will support you without adding any negativity.) Our blind spots are called “blind” for a reason; we just don’t see them. But they’ll be clear as day to others.

Discover the hidden payoff.

Becoming aware of your negative patterns, you see evidence they are disserving, perhaps even damaging, you. For example, if your pattern of conflict with co-workers has made you change jobs a number of times, your resume now reflects that pattern too.

The key to interrupting negative patterns is to understand this: we generally don’t keep repeating behaviors unless, on some level, we get something good out of them.

These hidden reasons are known as “payoffs,” and they either help you get more of something you want or avoid something you don’t want. Even a negative payoff is a payoff.

In the example above, the person in constant conflict with co-workers could be using the conflict to cover up insecurity with his/her work quality. The conflict, in effect, distracts from scrutiny.

Or, the conflict could stem from uncensored outspokenness. The person may have an oppressive situation at home, and being excessively outspoken at work may allow him/her to feel powerful and self-expressed in at least one arena of life.

Many years ago I held a management position within a Boutique Hotel Group. I often worked 60 hours a week, leaving little energy for my intimate relationship or time to do what made me happy. Ultimately, the relationship ended and all I was left with was work. A few years later that I realized I was overly identified by what I “did” rather than who I was and what my true values were. As soon as the awareness was clear the changes were easy to make and I left that position shortly after. That one decision set me on a path where I now experience balance in work and every area of my life.

Look for (and create) positive patterns.

One of the best ways to disrupt the negative patterns that may be wreaking havoc with your life is to also study the positive patterns in your life. For these can be “grafted” onto your negative patterns with great success. Choose an area of your life that is working well to analyze why that is so. Then, apply the same level of focus to any area that is not thriving to the same degree.

For example, you can utilize the discipline you’ve always had around working out regularly to stop using credit to finance your lifestyle.

When you look at your negative patterns as a gift rather than a curse, you can soften your resistance to looking at them. Bringing humor to a situation can begin to dissolve layers of patterning. Clients often exclaim, “I can’t believe I am dealing with this again after all these years”.

We then laugh and remember change comes in small and big chunks as and when you are ready.

Begin with a pattern that is less charged/intimidating if you like … then, just begin!

Love and Blessings,

The Curvy Line to Success

Have you heard the saying “The shortest distance between two points is a straight line” ?

Of course you have, it is a basic truth.

Over the years, I have pondered the principle of the straight line, hoping that if I found it I would create the career of my dreams; the problem was at the time I had no idea what my dream career would be.  I watched and listened to others as I attempted to find the key to this journey.

I was completely baffled at how anyone could graduate from high school, have their college years all mapped out, already knowing what their major would be; then, on to graduate school while keeping their career goals clearly in mind, following that straight line.

To say my career path did not follow a straight line makes me break out in hysterical laughter. The truth is I have never done anything the conventional way, although I longed for it along the way.  I did not have anyone guiding me to be my unique self, to follow my intuition, or telling me that staying in one career wasn’t the only way to success, so I suffered with the underlying belief that I was doing it wrong.

Over the years, I was highly valued in the many positions that I held, I was always promoted into upper management, made an excellent salary, all the while wondering what could have been if I had been able to find the “straight line.” I was not yet able to value the diversified skill set that I had acquired. I continued to feel that I had not done it “right,” whatever right is.  Yet, in spite of my mental challenges, I began to develop what I saw as my own unique gifts and talents. I felt split in my corporate environment which did not support sharing of intuition, internal guidance, and using attraction but expected striving, nose to the grindstone, and working 70 hours a week. I knew there had to be a better way, now the task was to find it.

I did find a better way, through focusing on my spiritual growth and what made me unique both in business and as a woman.  I began listening to my guidance, taking classes, immersing myself into self-discovery courses along with following visionaries that were sharing the same message.

I left structured employment 12 years ago at a time when many well meaning friends said I was crazy. They told me that I needed to stay a bit longer, save more money, and make sure I was stable. I knew one thing for sure; if I did not make a change I would become very sick. Just as I was pulling together all of my courage to give my notice, a card arrived in the mail, it said, “sometimes the only mode of transportation available is a leap of faith.” That was all I needed to leap! 3 months later I was an entrepreneur doing anything I could to keep the money flowing in and creating a business.

I bet you are not surprised that I did not follow the “straight line.” I did not have a business plan, a marketing plan or, for that matter, even an office. I had not heard of a business coach and did not have the funds to pay one at the time anyway.

By this time in my life, what I did have was a very highly tuned intuition. I was guided to become a Certified Life Coach. Very quickly the practical aspects of coaching were married with the intuitive guidance and my business was formed. Rather than seeking the straight line path I allowed myself to be guided each step of the way through an amazing journey of creation and expansion.

When I did hire my first business coach, I knew immediately I was in the right place. He came from a long line of surgeons. He had followed diligently the “straight line” to success and after 14 years of schooling he had his own plastic surgery practice. A mere 4 years later he was worn out, consumed with debt and very unhappy. He said that the MD on his jacket stood for, “Mostly Disappointed.” After much soul searching, he sold his practice and followed his passion to become a full time business coach, he is now very happy and yes, successful.

I have a skill set that assists me in managing every area of my business that came out of learning customer service at a time when it was highly revered in the Airline Industry, managing 3 separate medical clinics, owning a clothing business, Assistant Manager of a Boutique Hotel and Spa Director for two amazing properties.  I now am the co-founder of What Truly Matters: Living Your Juiciest Life Ever!

Ironically, I realize now that all of my past experience led me to and prepared me for my current business success.  And, as I draw on the years of diverse experience, I am very grateful that I took the “curvy line to success.”

Love and Blessings,

Top 10 Daily Practices of Loving Relationships

February brings us into the month of Love. For many this is a joyful time as Valentine’s

Day approaches, for others it only brings stress. For some the feeling of being alone, not part of a couple rises to the surface, everywhere you look it seems that everyone is coupled. For others the stress comes from feeling they need to create the most romantic over the top event of the year, and what if it is not enough.

I am focusing on love that sustains over the long term and not only romantic love and not only on Valentine’s Day. It would be very hard, if not impossible, to find anyone that has not been touched in recent years by the loss of a loved one, to long term or very sudden illnesses.

Cancer is the #2 cause of death in the United States; in 2013, 1,600 people died of cancer per day. We must begin to cherish the relationships we have in every area of our lives now.

We are experiencing relationships on many levels every day; each one is filled with the opportunity for loving expression. Each relationship is truly a treasure when you slow down enough to look at it with fresh eyes.

Living with those you love—whether they be a spouse, significant other, housemate, children or older parents—brings intimacy and stresses that are different from other relationships.

Here are 10 daily practices that will inspire you to keep the love flowing and the relationships growing.  

  1. Share something from your day. Involve your loved ones in your life outside the home—or inside your heart. Share something that surprised and delighted you.
  2. Express appreciation. Show that you notice their daily contributions to the family and your life. Receiving a “thank you” for doing the dishes or taking out the trash feels soooo good!
  3. Eat dinner together. Connecting with each other over food is an ancient human practice. It’s worth it to make time for this warming activity, while allowing yourself to transition into your evening together.
  4. Do something for yourself. Doing what nourishes you strengthens your relationships. No one can love you more than you love yourself! Taking time for your needs is not selfish it is essential.
  5. Smile. Laughing is even better—especially if it’s at yourself!
  6. Express regret and make up. The sooner the better. And from a truly open heart. Learning to say you are sorry will ease tension and bring all relationships to a higher level.
  7. Take responsibility. Renew daily your vow to hunt out your own “stuff,” to own it as yours, and to do the work of transforming it, end the pattern of “blame”.
  8. Be a sanctuary. Give psychic “shade” to each other from the scorching rays of difficult days, no dumping.
  9. Speak from the heart. Risk telling the truth about your feelings. When you own your feelings a new depth of connection is available.
  10. Envision the best. It’s a wonderful bedtime meditation to visualize your loved ones inhabiting their highest, best selves, bathe them in love

I invite you to begin living and loving consciously. Where can you spread light and love today? Notice what your experience is over the next 30 days as you commit to this practice.

Email info@whattrulymatters.com to share your insights and experiences.
Love and Blessings,

Choosing To Be Surprised and Delighted

With each new day you see and experience many things all around you, too many to count, really.

From the moment you open your eyes in the morning you are looking at a new canvas, even if you are in the same room you have slept in for years. The light will be different each day based on the seasons and the outside weather. If you are well rested, your vision will be clearer, or a bit foggier if you struggled through the night. The more familiar the surroundings the less you really see. You get locked into what you expect will be there and not really, “see” at all.

Remember a time in your life when you lay on the ground doing nothing but watching the clouds floating by in the sky?  Suddenly, much to your delight, the cloud became an angel, dog, horse, and then gently shifted back into being a cloud once again. When you seize the opportunity to slow down and be with what is all around you, the ability to see is enhanced.

This is also true of seeing the people in your life. How often do we stop and gently take in the presence of the people we intimately share our daily lives with?  It would change how we appreciate each other, seeing each other fresh each day.  The greatest gift you can give another is to really see them, not through the eyes of what you already know and expect, rather with curiosity asking, “Who is this divine being today?“  Go one step further, and share with love what you see; relationships will deepen because of this.

Photo by Adrian MendozaOn New Year’s Eve, I met with a friend from my hometown that I had not seen for at least 40 years. It was easy to meet this man and really see him for who is now, without the imprint of past impressions.  We enjoyed coffee and conversation, reconnecting and finding much in common.

He is a photographer, a camera bouncing off his hip as he walks. On the way back to the car he snapped a photo periodically; I wondered what caught his eye.

My car was in the bank parking lot, one I use often. I noticed he had taken a photo and I glanced in that direction. I saw a wall of brick and wood and was sure he must have taken the shot of something else.  At that moment he said, “Look at this.”  I gasped when I looked at the photo.  It was of the wall I initially looked at, although I had not really seen it at all.  In the photo there was an ornate pattern that was stunning, created by the shadows of the trees nearby. In that moment I realized how much I missed what was right in front of me and began looking at everything differently. I am now seeing the colors, angles, shading and so much more.  A whole new experience has opened up for me from that one special moment.

We are in the initial days of a New Year, 2014 is ahead full of promise. Often, the year’s intentions are strong and compelling in beginning of January.  All too soon the routine takes over and we find ourselves back in the life that we were so determined to change just a few short weeks ago. What if you do it differently this year? Keep bringing yourself back and stay in touch with What Truly Matters to you. The Universe provides opportunities every minute to surprise and delight you if you open your eyes to see. I invite you to begin today, what do you see?

           

Love and Blessings,

Living Stress Free is a Choice…

I have been deeply pondering this idea of Living Stress Free as a Choice

Have you noticed that when your attention is on something specific the opportunities show up everywhere to challenge you?  “So, you think you can just choose to be stress free, ok, let’s see how you deal with this situation!”

My first challenge was at the post office, I had received a yellow slip that required me to go to the window. I planned when I would go since I am completely aware that this is the holiday season and our already busy post office will be packed. I allotted enough time to ensure a stress free experience. The atmosphere was exactly as I expected, a long line had already formed many people with numerous packages to mail. I scanned the windows and was pleasantly surprised to see all 4 windows open, which is rare, now I was encouraged that the line had potential to move quickly, yes I was remaining stress free and even had a slight smile. It was not long until I noticed 4 windows were open and yet only 2 had people actually working in them, I was determined not to let it bother me.

Standing at the first window was a mother and her 6-year old, very animated, and energetic daughter who was attempting to use the strings of her knit hat to create a jump rope; the results were poor at best. With each failed attempt, she let her frustration show very loudly. I was looking for every way to be inspired by the youthful exuberance that I was witnessing. Ok, I did have a thought that the mother could acknowledge her daughter’s presence as she was tugging on her sweater screaming, “Mom I want to see what the man is doing!” at least 10 times. Not going to give my well being away, I was determined to stay out of judgment and stress free, so I put the smile back on my face. Now I glanced at the clock and as 20 minutes had passed with only 1 additional person being served, I decided to pay more attention to what was going on; the mother and daughter were both getting passports. It was obvious with the number of questions being asked that this window would be tied up for a lot longer.

I was aware of the grumblings from those in line, “Only two windows open this is ridiculous!” “The post office wants us to do more business with them – well, they better start providing better service!” “What the heck is going on here anyway?”… You get the idea. I took a deep breath and returned to choosing to be stress free. I was feeling pretty darn good with how I was doing, when the man behind decided to engage me directly with his complaints and how this was making him late for his next stop, that he was a working man after all: he was angry. I just nodded my head showing a compassionate smile and kept breathing making sure I did not match his irritation.

Once again I looked at the clock; 35 minutes have passed without any movement.  I noticed that a little annoyance began to creep in, as I started paying attention to what was going on at the one other open window.  A woman had numerous packages that showed no addresses! Now, that is very unusual. She was asking the clerk, “If I mail this to Canada, first class, how much will it be?”  “If I add insurance what will that price be?” “If I send it regular post what will that price be?”  “Oh, I forgot to ask when will the package arrive if it is sent by first class or regular post?” Now, I don’t know why it makes  any difference if you are only asking for information or actually sending the packages, yet for some reason this is where I lost my stress free choice and went into judgment; I decided that this woman was taking too much time and needed to move on so that paying customers could complete their transactions. I caught myself immediately and started to chuckle, right at that moment, I re-chose my stress free experience.

At the same time the passports were completed, the other woman had all the information she needed and the little girl merrily skipped out with her mom. All was well I thought, the line would move quickly now. At that moment a collective groan was heard from those in line and I saw that the first window had put up a closed sign; he had run out of register tape, I could not contain my laughter. Within a few moments the window opened again and the line did move quickly and I was out the door; it took 45 minutes to receive my package and I had a great lesson in the process! I congratulated myself on staying stress free for the majority of the time, and left the post office with a smile.

Many of us hurry through life going from one place to the next, focused on  running the next errand, and believing we will never have enough time to do all the things we need to get done. We allow the circumstances of the day to dictate how we feel.  Being anxious and stressed out does not make anything better or make the line move faster. Yet, you can be calm through it all if you just realize that you are the creator of this life you chose to live and continue to choose to live. Life is lived through a series of choices and being free from stress is one of those choices.

It is my hope that you choose to be stress free so that you may happily live the life that you desire from this day forward.

Love and Blessings,

Learning from Simon and Garfunkel…

”Slow down, you move too fast
You got to make the morning last
Just kicking down the cobblestones
Looking for fun and feeling groovy”

December is upon us, ushering in the end of 2013, amazing how fast the time has gone. This is the perfect time for completions, an essential component to align your energies for the New Year. I hear you groan, “How can I add one more thing with everything I already have ahead of me to make it through the holidays and this year?”

Just for a moment contemplate what it would be like to actually, thrive and enjoy the month fully, versus focusing on how to get through it!  With the tendency to add more to do’s and pressure to your life, it is more important than ever to slow down and connect within. If you are overextending yourself and just getting through the days, you will miss the opportunity for reflection.

How you began the year was important and how you end it is just as important.

The past year has provided many challenges; no one has been immune, we have experienced energies that have never before been present. Each day became an adventure in learning how to navigate new territory. Along with the challenges came miracles and breakthroughs in relationships, heart openings, in business and every area of life; capturing these moments will show you the richness of this year’s journey.

You know where you started, so here are a number of questions for you to consider as you move toward the finish line of 2013. You may decide to walk with one question at a time, and to jot down the insights that come up during the day allowing your inner guidance to direct you. Or, you may decide to block out some quiet uninterrupted time to deeply reflect. Add any of your own questions that are calling to be answered:

  1. What specific results have you achieved so far this year?
  2. Are you healthier, wealthier, and wiser? Describe in detail.
  3. Are you making progress towards your life’s vision or just holding ground?
  4. What results are you committed to achieve by the end of the year?
  5. How have you grown and what have you learned this year?
  6. Is there any unfinished business that needs to be tended to in your life?
  7. Are you actively pursuing what’s most important on a daily basis? If not what is it?
  8. What habits do you need to change to ensure better results?
  9. What is the key issue that inhibits your ability to perform at your best?

I suggest you give yourself the time to answer and honor these questions, because when it comes to the last days of the year, everyday and everything you do counts.

Happy Holidays!

Love and Blessings,

Love In Action

I am so happy that I have been around long enough now that I am seeing the payoff of gaining some wisdom.

Yes, I claim that I carry wisdom and tons of it, although in the past that wisdom often went out the window when I was with family. Oh you know how it goes; you start out really great, so happy to see each other, happy to be connecting again, and then the old starts leaking in.

You remember how you have always been irritated with this behavior and that behavior; you would think there had been enough years that have gone by that you each would have evolved a bit! So how do you relate lovingly in spite of it all?

The saying, “Words are cheap, action speaks,” is never more true than when applied to family situations and sharing your love. Whether interacting with a romantic partner, your children or other family members, if the actions aren’t there to back up the loving words, it all means nothing. Below are 10 of the best ways to say, “I love you” in your actions. But there are thousands more. See how creative you can get in coming up with your own ideas.

  1. Greet your loved ones with a big smile, a hug and a kiss.
  2. Really listen to what your loved ones are saying; give them your undivided and undistracted attention.
  3. Spend time doing some things they enjoy, you may find you enjoy them also
  4. Do simple (even random) acts of kindness, such as massaging shoulders or feet, cooking a favorite meal, running a bath.
  5. Spend one-on-one time with your loved ones, with no particular agenda.
  6. Commit to truly accepting each other’s faults.
  7. Be kind and respectful no matter what you are sharing, always preserving another’s self-esteem.
  8. Be impeccable with your word. If you say you’ll do something, do it, and by the time you said you’d do it.
  9. Take responsibility for your part in any conflict, and then look at how you can do better next time. Step out of the blame game.
  10. Share yourself and what lives deeply inside of you. This is a precious gift and conveys trust and security.

During my recent trip to visit family #10 played a big role. I have always been seen as different in my family and yes it’s true, not less than, and yet very different. Over the years I was not fully myself attempting to smooth the waters, not this time. I showed up fully being myself and guess what… I was acknowledged, appreciated and valued. Yes, we have all changed over the years and yet what made the change possible is that “I” made the decision to show up differently, I decided to let my light shine, share my insights, ideas and opinions and let their reaction be fine, whatever that reaction was. Much to my delight the reaction I received was very positive.

As you enter into this holiday season, spending time with family, friends and loved ones I invite you let your past stories fall away and step into each moment more present and loving allowing your true light and love to shine through.

Share your experiences and insights at info@whattrulymatters.com we would love to hear from you!

Love and Blessings,

Powered by WishList Member - Membership Software

Claim Your FREE Gift!

7 Steps to Do Less and Accomplish More!

It’s a combination of the know-how and removing the obstacles.

 We can help you with these three steps because we have a consistent track record of doing so, both as corporate executives and as entrepreneurs and business owners.


     *


    You have Successfully Subscribed!